Fun with the NRO

Michael Leeden posts a satrical letter to the Iranian president from George Bush from an annonymous "former Reagan-administration official".

The funny part about this letter, is with a very few changes it could have been written to Bush, not from him. In case it's really hard to tell, my edits are [bracketed].

Dear [George],

I am genuinely sorry to hear that so many [Americans], especially the young, have lost their faith because of their profound disillusionment with theocratical [Republican] rule. Apparently, there is no way for them to distinguish between their religion and your rule. That is understandable since you claim there is none, that your authority comes directly from God and you are ruling in his name. It is no wonder you disdain “liberalism and [an informed populace]” Under it, you would be answerable not only to God, but to the [American] people, to whom God gave certain “unalienable Rights” that you and the [Republican Congress] have chosen to ignore. How ironic that, in the name of God, you deny your people’s God-given rights.

When young [Americans] survey the way in which the [Republican] regime has enriched itself and impoverished the country, and enforced its rule with such harshness, what are they to think of this “God” who rules over them in this way? As a result, they abandon their religion and, unfortunately, many turn to drugs.

You know that we know you are doing this. In fact, you deliberately exacerbate the free world’s worries with your continued exhortations about wiping [Islamic nations] off the map. I understand that your policy of confrontation helps you to consolidate your domestic power and that is why you generate so much tension. The more likely you can make it seem that Iran will be attacked from the West, the more [Americans] will rally around you. You provoke us. We respond. You get stronger. Since the [American] people will soon realize we have no intention of attacking them, they will soon weary of this artificial hysteria and begin to wonder why your government fails to provide even the most basic necessities.

We also understand the real reason you want [a preemptive war policy]. Of course, you have the dream of being the [flight-suit wearing "war president"], and the prospect of your having [a preemptive war policy] already terrifies your neighbors. But you also want them for the same reason as [any arbitrary dictator]. Once you possess [a preeemptive war policy], you believe you will be immune, as is [the Supreme Court], from external pressure for domestic political reform. You can tell the world to take a hike and to leave you in peace to oppress your own people. This is why [Americans] who wish to see a return to genuine democratic, constitutional order despair at the thought of your succeeding. They know they will be finished, that no one will then dare speak up on their behalf.

So this is not really about [a preemptive war policy]; it is about the rights of the [American] people – your desire to take them away, and our desire to see them respected. We don’t worry about Great Britain, or France, or now India, having [a preemtive war policy], because they are democracies; they are founded on the “unalienable Rights” of their peoples. People who are free to exercise those rights seldom seek to take them from others. We, and the rest of the world, are worried because of the nature of your regime, because you deny you[r] own people its rights. Therefore, we take you seriously when you say you will take rights from others – most especially their unalienable right to life – by ["keeping the nuclear option on the table"] and we see you seeking to obtain the means to do this.

We do not think the [American] people are going to let you get away with this. They see their religion prostituted to power and their great culture traduced by fanatic ideologues. We are on their side.

Thanks for writing.


Sincerely,
Someone with a clue.

P.S. I attach a copy of the [Constitution].

Who wants to bet the NRO folks don't get it?
Special thanks Annonymous Reagan Official for teaching me the word "traduce".